


I Am No Hero

by Badi_otaku



Series: Dean Winchester/Sister Incest [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ambiguous Relationships, Brother/Sister Incest, F/M, Reader-Insert, Sibling Incest, Sibling Love, Siblings, Winchester Sister
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-03
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-09-28 02:11:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10065725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Badi_otaku/pseuds/Badi_otaku
Summary: When you move as much as you and your family do, you can’t expect to make long-term friends. And the only people you can rely on are your brothers. Truth be told, they are the only ones you need in your life. And when you are stuck with them 24/7, you quickly realize how bad you need them.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> You can also find my work on tumblr: une-femme-de-lettres.tumblr.com

Truman High School.

It was the third school you’ve been to this year, and it was only November. Your father had found a job in a nearby town and had taken a room for you and your two brothers in the only motel in town. On Monday, he had dropped the three of you off at school and left for the next couple of weeks.

Like Sam, you were sick of always being the new kid in school. You had given up on making friends a long time ago so you spent most of your time with Sam. As twins, you were both in ninth grade, and you were lucky enough to be in the same class in English, PE and History. At least one good thing here…

As for Dean, well, for him school was a game, and a new school only meant new teachers to piss off and new girls to flirt and make out with. The last bit bothered you a little, to be honest. You were very close to you brothers. Sam was your confidant, he understood you better than anyone else, and vice versa. But Dean… He was your hero. You looked up to him. He was always there when you wanted to talk, when you needed advice, or when you simply sought comfort and warmth. You would do anything to please him and make him proud.

But seeing him with these girls made you angry, jealous, even. You knew you shouldn’t feel that way. Dean was a grown man and he could do whatever he wanted with his life. But you couldn’t help it. You wanted your brother’s attention, _all_ his attention, the _same_ attention he gave those girls.

* * *

Dean, Sam and you were heading to the entrance of the building to start your first day. “You got your lunch, books… Butterfly knife?” Dean asked, looking at you and Sam. You simply nodded.

“Yeah, Dean.” Sam mumbled. Your eyes locked with Dean’s in a silent exchange and Dean turned to Sam, stopping in front of him. You stood next to your twin brother.

“You okay?” Dean asked with a concerned look. Sam sighed.

“Sure.” He replied, quickly walking passed Dean, adverting his eyes.

Dean looked at you again and you shrugged slightly. The bell rang and you immediately took a step forward, not wanting to be late on the first day. However, you suddenly stopped, turned around and trotted back to Dean to plant a kiss on his cheek, standing on tiptoes and holding on his coat for support. You then quickly made your way to the entrance to catch up with Sam.

Your first course was English. You were grateful that Sam was with you in this class. You got to be with him when the teacher would introduce you to the students, so you wouldn’t have to face an entire class on your own.

Your English teacher, Mr. Wyatt, seemed nice. He introduced you to the class before telling you and Sam to grab a seat. You sat down on a desk near the windows and Sam sat a few rows behind. You didn’t say a thing for the whole hour, barely listening to the lesson as you found yourself often thinking about Dean.

* * *

“Class, say hello to our new student, Dean Winchester.” The History teacher said, a smile plastered on her face. She expected a reaction from the students sitting in front of her, but she got none. Instead, an awkward silence stretched out for a few seconds, sometimes disturbed by a few coughs. The lady, seemingly unfazed, turned to the young man standing next to her. “Dean, is there anything you’d like to tell us about yourself?” She asked politely. Dean looked at her, shaking his head with a shrug.

“Not really, Sweetheart.” He answered, earning a few laughs from the class.

“Take your seat.” The teacher said firmly, annoyed by the young man’s cockiness.

Dean started walking down the aisle. His look crossed the one of a pretty blonde sitting a few rows ahead. He reached an empty desk and sat down nonchalantly on the chair, not bothering to remove his coat. The teacher looked at him again with a scolding look.

“Dean, where are your books?” She asked. Dean shrugged.

“Don’t need ‘em, Sugar. Not gonna be here long enough, anyways.” He replied with a smirk. The teacher’s jaw tightened as a few students chuckled at his daring.

The blonde girl turned her head slightly to look at him. Dean’s eyes found hers again as he gave her a charming smile. She smiled shyly before straightening up to stare at the black board. All things considered, maybe he could like it here…

The teacher didn’t waste any more time and started her lesson. The blonde girl listened religiously. Dean, on the other hand, didn’t give a crap about what the old lady said. He sighed softly, slouching on his chair and burying his hands in the pockets on his coat. He frowned slightly when he felt something unfamiliar entwining with his fingers. It felt like fabric, a light and soft fabric. He pulled his right hand out of his pocket to take a look at the strange object.

His eyes widened slightly when he saw the light pink lace covering his hand. He shoved his hand right back into his pocket, discreetly glancing around him to make sure no one saw the garment. He sighed again in an attempt to keep his composure. He knew who that thing belonged to. For that reason, he didn’t know if he should be pleased or mad.


	2. Chapter 2

“Explain this.” Dean demanded, throwing the light pink garment onto the open book you had on your lap.

It was almost noon, you were sitting on the bleachers, by the sports field, waiting for your brothers to join you for lunch. You jumped slightly, surprised by Dean’s action. You glanced around you to make sure no one was close enough to see you and turned your head to look at your big brother.

He looked pissed. Your eyes fell on the pink lace. You didn’t bother to put it away and looked up at him again. So he found them, huh? Of course he did, you made sure to tuck them in the right pocket of his coat this morning, before going to class, so he would have a nice surprise when he put his hands in his pockets, like he always did when trying to look cool.

“I bought them a couple of days ago. They’re quite comfortable.” You said, purposefully not responding to his request. “You like them?” You then asked with a mischievous smile. Dean took a deep breath, adverting his eyes. He was angry.

“That’s not what I meant, and you know it.” He scolded. “You can’t do that, (Y/N).” He said, gesturing towards your piece of clothing that still lay on the white pages of your book.

“You didn’t like my surprise…?” You asked with a deliberate innocent tone. Dean closed his eyes and sighed in annoyance, flexing his jaw nervously. You were doing that a lot lately. You liked to play with him, with his feelings. You had noticed the change in the looks he gave you, the way he touched you, letting his hands linger a bit too long and the kisses he laid on your cheeks, too close to your mouth to be appropriate.

But he loved you too much. He couldn’t help himself. And you knew that, and you didn’t care a rat’s ass about the fact that he was your brother, you loved him unconditionally.

“That’s not the point, (Y/N). You know it’s not _right_. I’m your damn _brother_!” He yelled, trying to keep his voice relatively down, still mindful of the people around you. “Not to mention that you’re only _fourteen_! I could go to jail for being with a girl your age!” He said.

“You’re _not_ going to jail. No one has to know, Dean…” You said, closing your book and getting off the bleachers to stand in front of your brother. He flinched slightly when you took his hand, squeezing it gently. “I love you, Dean.” You stated, looking at him straight in the eyes. “I love you more than any girl you’ve been with…” You said. He looked down, swallowing hard.

“I know.” He replied with a trembling voice. He knew that. And he loved you just as much. These girls he flirted with, they meant nothing to him. He hated himself for that but the truth was that he used them. He used them as a replacement, because he couldn’t have _you_. But they were never enough for him, and you knew that.

You took a step forward, closing the space between you and your brother. “I’m here, Dean. You don’t need them. You can have _me_. I need you, Dean. I need my big brother.” You said, your voice a mere whisper. He flinched slightly at your words.

“Don’t call me that…” He retorted, withdrawing his hand from your grip and pulling away from you. “We can’t do that. I’ll _never_ do that to you.” He stated, taking a step back. Your eyes widened slightly, you shook your head slowly.

“Dean, please, don’t push me away.” You begged, closing in again as he took another step back, turning around and walking away. You were about to go after him but decided against it. You sat back on the bleachers retrieving your book and tucking your piece of clothing away in your bag as Sam made his way to you, looking back at Dean questioningly when he walked passed him.

When Sam came to sit next to you, you pretended to be reading your book so he wouldn’t see the distress in your eyes. You held back your tears as Sam stood still and looked at you.

“What’s wrong?” He asked. You were foolish for believing that you could hide the fact that something just happened between you and Dean. And you were even more foolish for thinking you could hide your feelings from your twin. He knew you by heart and didn’t even need to look at you to sense your distress.

He knew what all this was about. It wasn’t hard to notice that something was going on between you and Dean, especially when he spent most of his time with the two of you. Over the years, he quickly realized that you and Dean were more than a brother and a sister to each other’s eyes.

You closed your book and looked at Sam in the eyes. You closed your eyes slowly, trying to stop the tears that were beading in the corner of your eyes. You opened them again to see Sam staring at you, his lips curved into a sad smile. You leaned closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder and staring into space.

“Do you think I’m a freak… for wanting Dean that way?” You asked Sam. He wrapped an arm around your shoulders to bring you closer, taking one of your hand and squeezing it lightly.

“No.” Sam answered gently. He couldn’t say he totally agreed with this. He knew how wrong it was. But somehow, it felt right to him. When he saw you with Dean, he felt like you were meant for each other. He couldn’t quite explain this feeling. It just felt… right.

“I’m scared, Sam.” You said, raising your head to look at your twin brother again. “What if Dean doesn’t like me anymore? Because of this, because of what I’m doing. What if he ditches me?”

“He won’t.” Sam stated. “He loves you, no matter what. And I do too, I love you. We’re gonna stick together, no matter what.” He said confidently. Sam knew full well that Dean would never leave you. He was practically programmed to take care of you and Sam, and that was what he had done his whole life. He would never fail his duty by leaving your side.

But that didn’t mean that Dean wouldn’t try to push you away. He knew what would happen if he stayed to close to you, so he would do his best to stay as far away from you as he could. And that was what Sam feared, because he didn’t know if you could take that rejection.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the comments and kudos, you guys are awesome! I hope you'll enjoy this chapter!

In the afternoon of your first day, you and Sam walked back to the motel after the end of your last class, enjoying the cool breeze of fall. You walked in silence, a comfortable silence. Neither one of you wanted to talk, so you just walked, hand in hand.

Dean didn’t come back immediately after his day, he stayed out to do whatever he was doing. Back at the motel, you showered while Sam started doing his homework. You went out of the bathroom a few minutes later, a towel wrapped around your body.

Sam didn’t pay attention to you. It wasn’t an unusual situation for you and your brothers considering your lifestyle. He didn’t mind you and started putting his notes in order on the small table of the motel room. Grabbing your clothes from the dresser, you put on a pair of panties, a bra and pajama pants.

“(Y/N), can I take a look at your notes? I think I missed something…” Sam asked, frowning while looking at the pages of notes he had taken during History class. You walked to you school bag and opened it.

“History?” You asked, looking over at your twin. He nodded silently. “Sure.” You said, grabbing your notes and making your way towards Sam. “Here you go.” You put your pages on the table, looking at Sam’s notes.

“Thanks.” He said, taking one of your papers and comparing it with one of his. You stood beside him, trying to spot the missing parts in his lesson. You pointed at a paragraph.

“Here, you didn’t write this part.” You said, Sam nodded as you tried to spot other missing bits. You were focused on reading your notes and didn’t pay attention to the person who entered the room and closing the door.

“Oh for God’s sake, (Y/N), put a freakin’ shirt on!” Dean yelled, throwing his coat on a chair and heading for the bathroom.

You were slightly shocked by the aggressiveness of his tone and words. Besides, seeing you like this never really bothered him up until now. And now he was yelling at you, obviously mad, and that left you somewhat upset.

You rushed to the dresser and put on a loose shirt. You swallowed in an attempt to get rid of the lump that formed in your throat. Sam put his papers down and looked at you as you made your way to your bag once again, taking out the homework you had to do. You sat at the table in silence and went to work.

“You okay?” Sam asked sweetly. You forced your lips into a small smile and looked at your brother.

“Yeah.” You said. Once again, you couldn’t hide your feelings from Sam. But he didn’t want to push you. So he sighed softly and kept on completing his notes with the missing parts.

You both worked in silence until Dean came out of the bathroom. Usually, he would have dressed in the room too, but given the circumstances, he dressed completely before going out. “I’m gonna fetch dinner.” He said, grabbing his coat again and heading outside.

When Dean came back, you ate dinner in an awkward silence. Dean lay on one bed while you and Sam sat at the table. You would risk a look at Dean, from time to time, only to see him staring into space, taking huge bites of his burger, not paying attention to you or Sam. So you would look away from him and do your best to swallow your food.

After dinner, Sam put away his school stuff and went to take a shower, leaving you and Dean alone in the room. You were still doing your homework. Well, you were actually pretending to do your homework since your brain seemed to be able to focus solely on what happened this morning.

An oppressive silence stretched for long minutes. Dean was lying on his back in bed, his arms under his head, staring at the ceiling above him. You looked at him for a second, he still didn’t pay attention to you.

“Are we gonna talk about this or not?” You finally asked, breaking the silence. You sounded angrier than you meant to and scolded yourself for that.

“Not.” He simply said before closing his eyes as if pretending you weren’t there. You put the pen you had in hand down, turning fully to your brother.

“But we’ll have to, at some point… You know it.” You insisted, standing up and taking a step towards your brother.

He sighed and got up, looking at you straight in the yes. “We’ve been over this already, what more is there to say?” He said, almost yelling. You looked down, swallowing the lump in your throat.

“Don’t do this, Dean…” You said softly. He looked at you with sad eyes but kept a firm tone.

“Do what?” He barked.

“Don’t push me away, please…” You said, your voice trembling slightly.

His heart broke when he saw you wrapping your arms around yourself as if you were trying to protect yourself. He closed his eyes and tried to hold back his tears.

“I just wanted you to look at me.” You then said. Your voice was soft but weak. He opened his eyes again to stare at you. You looked up at you brother, your heart racing, and kept on talking frantically, on the verge of tears. “I just wanted _you_. I want you to _love_ me. But now you’re mad at me for doing so. And now I realize that I completely fucked up and that we will never be the same anymore and that you don’t love me anymore -that you _hate_ me, but…” You paused, taking a deep breath and releasing it in a long sigh. “I’m sorry, Dean, okay?” You said, shrugging, looking at him apologetically. “I’m sorry that I’m such a freak. I’m sorry I tried to push you into doing this. I’m sorry I started all this.” You paused again, searching for the right words. “I-I’m sorry…” You didn’t know what else to say.

He stared at you for what felt like eternity. He then looked down, no longer able to look at you in the eyes. “I’m not mad at you.” He finally said, your heart felt suddenly lighter. “I’m mad at myself, I hate myself, (Y/N)…” He said, looking up. His beautiful green eyes were glistening with tears. “And the fact that I can’t do a _damn_ thing to change what I feel for you is driving me insane…” He admitted. Your heart sank. You rushed to him and threw yourself in his arms, clinging to his shirt. He didn’t push you away this time. He rested a hand on the top of your head, stroking your hair gently. “I could never be mad at you, Sweetheart. I could never hate you. I _love_ you, Baby, no matter what.” He said, kissing your forehead when you pulled away slightly to look at him.

“I love you too, Dean.” You said.

“But I’m not doing this to you. Not now.” He stated. You nodded. “I’m not pushing you away, I just…” He couldn’t find the words. “Promise me you won’t do that again and that we will leave it there for now.” He demanded. You nodded again.

“I promise.” You said, resting your head against his warm chest as he held you close.


	4. Chapter 4

When you and your brothers shared a room in a motel, you would usually share a bed with Sam. You felt safer with him beside you and you had basically slept this way for your whole life. Old habits die hard.

And that night was no exception. After your talk with Dean, Sam finished showering and the three of you went to bed. You kissed Dean Goodnight and crawled under the covers to snuggle against Sam.

You were both lying on your side, facing each other. The room was dark but the yellowish light of street lamps seeping through the window allowed you to make out the features of his face.

He wasn’t sleeping, neither were you, even if you had gone to bed more than an hour ago. The room was silent, except for the faint sounds of cars passing by on the street from time to time and Dean’s soft, steady snoring.

Sam was looking at you. Your gaze didn’t leave his face as his hand grabbed yours gently. You squeezed it lightly. “You okay?” He asked you for the second time tonight, whispering not to wake Dean up. This time, your smile was genuine.

“Yeah.” You said honestly. His lips bent into a small smile, content with your answer. You moved closer to him, nestling against him. “I love you, Sammy.” You whispered softly as he kissed your temple, wrapping an arm around your waist and holding you close.

“I love you too, (Y/N).” He said as you both slowly fell asleep, feeling safe and protected in each other’s warm embrace.

* * *

“You done?” You asked Sam quietly, looking at the paper he was writing on.

You were sitting next to each other at a table of the school library. You were both doing some math exercise. You had just finished your third one.

“Yep.” Sam replied, taking his paper and handing it to you. You did the same with yours. This was usually how you studied for tests and exams, switching your papers to correct each other’s work.

You tried to focus on Sam’s calculations and ignore the noise around you. It was a bit before noon and the library was pretty empty at this time of the day. But a group of students was sitting at a table, not far from you, chatting not so quietly about everything and nothing.

It was a group of four students, two boys and two girls, probably freshmen, like you and Sam. You recognized one of the girls from your history class, but you didn’t know the other three.

You looked at the paper you held in your hands, reading through Sam’s work, not paying attention to the girl who stood up from her chair and made her way towards you and Sam.

“Hey, Winchester!” A relatively deep voice called out. Both you and Sam raised your head with a questioning look. Your eyes went to the table where the group was sitting. You saw one of the boys slumped in his seat with his arm resting lazily on the back of the chair.

“Shut up, Chris.” You noticed for the first time the girl in your history class heading to your table. She scolded her friend, keeping her voice down so that she wouldn’t be heard by the librarian. She reached your table, giving you a friendly smile. “(Y/N), right?” She asked.

“Yeah.” You replied quietly. Your voice was quite hesitant. Let’s just say that you had no idea why she came here and talked to you. But you did your best to smile back.

According to what you heard from other students, this girl was one of the coolest, most popular freshman students. She was said to be very friendly, kind and hardworking. She would hang out with a group of kids who were as much popular as her. You assumed they were the ones sitting at the table. You weren’t cool or popular, you were just… here.

“We don’t see new faces often around here, and we like to welcome our new fellow students.” The girl said, picking your attention again. “And I know you just arrived here last week.” She explained, you smiled shyly. “So that would be cool if you hung out with us a bit. We could have lunch together, maybe?” She then suggested, shrugging slightly.

You looked down briefly, tucking a lock of hair behind your ear. You didn’t really know what to say to her. Up until now, you had spent most of your time with Sam and Dean. And when you weren’t with them, you were simply alone.

And that was okay for you, you didn’t really like company anyway. Above all, you didn’t like making friends mainly because you never stayed in one place more than a month at a time.

But despite all this, her proposition was quite tempting. It wasn’t that you didn’t like spending time with Sam and Dean, but maybe having lunch with other people could take your mind off things.

Still uncertain, you turned your head to look at Sam, silently asking him if you should go with them. You brother gave you a smile, nodding slightly. You turned to the girl again, smiling as well.

“Sure, that’d be awesome.” You said with a confident nod. Meeting new people was actually not that bad. And spending time with them wouldn’t hurt.

“Cool. I’m Danielle, by the way.” She said with a friendly smile. Your heart beat a little faster when she walked away slowly, heading back to the table where her group was sitting. You stood up from your chair and started packing your stuff.

The group waited for you by the door. You slung your bag over your shoulder and walked up to them with quick strides. You looked back at Sam, he was still smiling, he seemed happy for you, and that alone immediately set your heart on fire. You waved to him before exiting the library, following your new friends.

While walking to the cafeteria, Danielle introduced you to everyone. There was Christian and Zack, two boys that played in the freshman and sophomore foot-ball team. Then there was Tess, an old friend of Danielle’s. She knew her since primary school, they were practically like sisters. And finally, you were joined by two other girls, Ally and Brooke, they had met Danielle in middle school.

That was a lot of information at once, but nothing you couldn’t handle. You sat at a table in the middle of the cafeteria after grabbing your lunch. You gave them the usual ‘my-Dad-is-a-salesman,-we’re-not-staying-here-for-very-long’ speech and you started talking and laughing about mundane teenagers things. Everyone was kind and welcoming, sometimes complimenting you on your looks or your knowledge.

And for a moment, you managed to forget you were the new kid that lived at the motel, whose Dad had left with her two brothers to work miles from here. For once you got to feel like a normal teenager.


End file.
